Yesterday we had a work function to bid a member of the staff farewell. At the soiree I talked to one of the partners who works on my floor. I noticed that he was sporting some recently grown facial hair. He has a moustache/goatee combination. The Mike Lowell, if you will. I had been noticing his facial hair mith much jealousy. So I walked over to him and said:
“Hey, [Guy], I noticed that you have been sporting teh facial hair too. How long have you been growing that?”
“Oh, well I always grow facial hair on and off. I don’t really like shaving.”
“No. I mean, when did you start growing that facial hair? You were clean shaven when I started working in September.”
“Oh, this. Hmm. 5 days (look of shock on my face) No. About ten days.”
“Aw man. (I pout a little) I have been growing this (as I point to the paucity of hair on my face) for a day longer than you. You’re kicking my ass.”
He consoled me for a bit with platitudes on how everyone is different and to not judge my facial hair. But deep down, I was just jealous of his amazing facial hair growing prowess. Also, yesterday my secretary made fun of me.
Yesterday was hilarious.
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